Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize