I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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