she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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