Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize