I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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