The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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