so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize