the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
My brain says no but my pants say off.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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