im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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