someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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