You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
I have post one night stand depression
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
