In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
