As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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