I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize