Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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