chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
should my penis look like a turkey
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
how drunk are you?
Several
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
