Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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