I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
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