But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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