i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Randomize
