R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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