Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Panties = found
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