I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
