He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
