Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
