The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
