just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
