we have pet lesbian snakes
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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