ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
