My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
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