He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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