Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Randomize