Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
