Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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