i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
