You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
