Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Randomize
