I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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