On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
