what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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