she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
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