If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
