i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Randomize
