It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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