no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Randomize
