turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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