Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
