My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
Randomize
