Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I didn't notice because vodka
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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