I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Randomize
