just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Randomize
